A Guide to be a Better Decision-maker

We make countless decisions everyday! From small ones like what to wear to work, and what to cook for dinner to bigger ones like what career to pursue and which house to buy. Some decisions are intuitive and spontaneous while some demand careful thought and deliberation. It can feel paralyzing when you are stuck in a limbo, weighing the pros and cons of the options, but what is worse than making the wrong decision is not making one at all. So instead of being intimated by the next decision that comes my way, I scoured the internet trying to figure out how to be better at making decisions. Here is what I found:

Know Your Values

“Know thyself” is the mantra to good decision making. When you recognize the values that you uphold, its easier to pick a path that aligns most with your values. For any decision, ask what are you optimizing for- is it time, money, quality of life, comfort or something else? For instance, you are in the market for a couch – if you have ample time on your hand and limited money that you want to spend on the couch, thrift stores or facebook marketplace is your way to go. On the other hand, if you are short on time and don’t care as much about the money, then head to the furniture store. Doing both can feel exhausting. Choose one path.

Recognizing if you are a maximizer or a satisficer is another great way to approach decisions. By nature, some people are always keen on getting the maximum value from anything. They will go through countless options while on the hunt for the perfect choice, and still be unsatisfied with the choice, thinking that there is still something better out there. On the other hand, satisficers know exactly what they are looking for and once they have found something that fits their need, they zero in on the option without having the #fomo that they can do better. Ask yourself if you are a maximizer or a satisficer? In some cases it is better to be a maximizer while in others, being a satisficer can save you a lot of time.

Know Your Fears

At times we avoid certain choices, not because we don’t want them, but because we fear where those choices will lead us. They may hurt some people you care about, or might put you in an uncomfortable spot. So with any decision, ask yourself if there is any outcome that you are consciously or subconsciously fearing. And then question yourself if those fears are legitimate and can you overcome them.

Flip a Coin

Leave a major life decision to the probability of a coin? No way! And you shouldn’t. Rather reflect on how you feel with the result of a coin flip. Do you feel elated or disappointed by the decision that the coin made for you. Making a decision hypothetically and observing how you feel about it is a great way to tap into your gut feeling and hear what it’s trying to tell you.

In an episode of the TV Show ‘Friends’, Rachel takes a pregnancy test. Scared of the outcome, she asks her friend Phoebe to check the result for her. At first, Phoebe tells her that the test is negative, which surprisingly disappoints Rachel. It is then that Phoebe tell hers that the test is positive and she is going to be a mother. Rachel ends up being overjoyed by the result, an emotion she wasn’t expecting to feel.

Try your Decision

Lets say you are contemplating a career change. Figure out if there are ways in which you can try out the role without committing to it. At times we have an ideal picture of some decisions, only to have taken them and realized that reality is far from it. Try out your decisions, if you can.

Automate the Tiny Decisions

If you are a person easily exhausted by decisions and you have to take many of them on a daily basis, then reflect on your day and come up with opportunities where you can automate some of the minor decisions and save your energy for the major ones. It can be choices like what to wear on a first date, a financial budget for different aspects of your life, or a weekly meal plan.

Run it by People

For larger decisions in life, reach out to friends and family and get a second opinion. At times we are clouded by our biases and experiences, and we do not see the obvious loopholes in our thoughts. Going over your choices, with the people you trust, is always a good way to check your biases.

Identify your Influencers

Our thoughts are never our known. They are a culmination of all we have experienced so far, the books we have read, and the people we have interacted with. Similarly, our decisions are also influenced by past experiences and the people we know. When contemplating between two choices, be aware of how your thoughts are influenced. These influences might not necessarily be negative but simply recognizing them helps you make a more informed decision and not get swayed by others.

Lean into Solomon’s Paradox

It is easier to make decisions for others, than it is for yourself. This is called the Solomon’s Paradox. Separate yourself from the decision. Pretend as if you are making the decision for a friend. How would you approach it then? Journaling your thoughts is a great way to distance yourself from the decision and approach it objectively, versus emotionally.

Optimize for Serendipity, Fun and a Life of Fewer Regrets

When conflicted between two choices, choose the one with larger scope for luck. The result of most choices are never immediate. But one thing leads to another, and the random pottery class you took 3 years ago, may lead you to start a ceramic business. You never know the direction that life takes, so whenever conflicted, choose the option that makes life fun and interesting and opens you up to more possibilities. Make choices that energize you rather than drain you. Ask if you will regret not going down a path today? If yes, then run down that path.

Hopefully this helps you and me in feeling a little less stuck in the myriad of choices this word has to offer, while still being unable to decide what to watch on Netflix. That is a problem for another time.

References

P.S. What chatGPT had to say?

I asked chatGPT how to make better decisions. Honestly, it had a darn good answer. So if you are looking for something shorter, here you go:

Asra Yousuf